Bed Rest

Today I went in for a routine OB visit fully expecting to listen to Gracie's heartbeat and then take sweet Caroline to the park to play with her friends. However, because of some really high blood pressure, I was admitted to triage where they monitored me and did some blood work. Then I was sent over to have an ultrasound. Then I was sent back to triage for more monitoring. Turns out that I have mild pre-eclampsia. My blood pressure went down once I laid on my side so that is why they have put me on bed rest. I go back on Friday morning for more testing so I guess we'll just go from there. My doctors have said that if my blood pressure continues to get higher they will have to induce me or do an emergnecy Csection(depending on how urget it is) because once your blood pressure gets to high then I am at risk of injury.
The sonogram for Gracie went okay. Her heartbeat was strong but he did say that her heart looked a little dialated and that he could see a little fluid buidling up on her heart. He said that is a slight indication that something could be going wrong. The amniotic fluid that was 2.7 last Tuesday in now down to 1.6. That, obviously isn't a very good sign. Benji and I really feel that our time with Gracie will probably be limited to a couple of more weeks unless they have to induce me for blood pressure reasons. We just don't know how much longer she can survive in such little fluid. We are somewhat discouraged because we want so much for her to be born alive so we can have just those few moments with her. But, we walk by faith knowing that God's timing is perfect and He will take her when it's just the right time. Only God knows what we can handle and maybe Gracie being born alive isn't something we can handle. Watching her slowly die might just be an unberable burden so we trust and know that the Lord will do what He knows is best. Fear set in today as I considered that I might not get to leave the hospital and that they could possibly induce me. I just kept telling myself that I wasn't ready, but will I ever be ready? The answer is no......
Please pray for us. We are definitely reaching the end and it's terrifying. However, we know we are not alone. We know, confidently, that God has walked us through this so far and we know that He will continue to walk with us and even before us. I am so thankful that we have a God that loves us so much.